Stop me from Falling

With the midnight sun taking it's rightful place,
in it's shadow we walked,
with your hand in mine...I fell
With trust in my heart and the rhythm of yours, we slept...I fell
Your arms wrapped tightly around me....I fell
Before the sun rose, I watched you sleep....I fell
I took your scent with me and with me it remains.
When the sun rose we kissed goodbye.
How did I let myself fall?

Spirit is amazing!

" I am what I am" said Popeye! So what are you?

I visited Lily Dale, a spiritualistic community in Chautauqua County, New York. When I had mentioned where I was visiting, I had received very different opinions and some facial expressions I could have done without.

I attended a guided meditation class hosted by one of the mediums. This was a different kind of guided meditation. Before we began she gave everyone in the class a small block of modeling clay. As she guided the meditation she told us to let spirit guide you, keeping your eyes closed, mold and shape your clay. When I opened my eyes, I was taken back by what I had made. Granted it's not fine art, however, having never sculpted before and being barley able to color in the lines, the picture above was my result. I let loose, let my mind and hands do the work. It was an amazing experience. So many people in the class had the same reaction, " did I make this? ".

Because I am a lover of nature, I also enjoyed all the scenery. It was peaceful and filled with flowers, green grass, butterflies, birds and a sense of serenity.

Truth is, believe what it is you need to. You can make your faces and pass your judgments, but all in all Lily Dale was beautiful. I enjoyed my day, and can't wait to visit again. If you are a nature lover and have an open mind, you will be greeted with smile and friendly faces.

I know what I am...comfortable with learning new things. Learning and listening with respect for what I am being taught.

What are you?

Tomorrow

The sound of your voice is pure adrenaline, running through my veins.
My rapid heart cannot grasp the thought of all that encompasses you.
With few words that speak, my day is fulfilled, yet I yearn for more.
The day we meet again is fast approaching.
My senses are heightened as the hours pass.
Your gentle voice and sweet touch is what I long for.
I can only hope to see me the the windows of your soul,
for when you look into mine, there you shall be.

Alone...

To the man who haunts my very core,
Lover everlasting is what you promised!
I'm a captive in your heart, seduced by your voice and tender touch.
My eyes can only see you, my flesh craves only your mouth.
With one sultry look, I am lost in eternity seeking only you.
Then the sun rises,
I am awaken by the light, I can hear your voice,
feel your touch and yet you are no where to be found!
Return to me my King of the Night, for I am your Queen!

in another life we....

Who is this man who has awakened my soul with one simple touch...
As we great, I float in a bubble of confusion.
I follow the sound of his voice as if I were a lost child being called.
He consumes every part of my conscious mind, tantalizing my every thought.
I crave his touch and taste his skin.
His scent leaves me hungry.
Just when I think in my slumber I will escape, I hear his soothing voice.
He calms my soul, follows me into my slumber,
with your scent on my flesh, your sweat on my tongue,
I am awakened by your touch, with my lips parting my tongue forms my name,
"it's nice to meet you, I'm Elmelinda."
In a cloud of confusion , I already understand that we must have already met.

Blue

My troubles lifted when the music starts.
It lifts me off the floor and I spin like a carousel, slow at first then faster!
My soul leaves my corpse and I am lifted towards the heavens.
I reach and touch the dark blue sky. I find a star to sit upon,
I watch my troubles fall.
Suddenly the music stops playing.
The carousel has stopped spinning.
When the troubles are all dropped, I am left to do nothing but weep.
Weeping so hard the mortals below think it's raining.
They all take pleasure in my sorrow.
They giggle and laugh at my tears.
I scream to the Gods to lift this Vail!
Oh when, when will this blue Vail be lifted?

Restless Tomorrow

I know where it is I came from.
I know where I have been.
I will never know tomorrow or what tomorrow brings.
Our eyes met and it's as if time stood still.
Though when we are together, time is quickly to pass.

I sit on the stairs and wait in shame lingering in our lust,
I hold myself back from trying to erase you from my mind.
I can taste your skin on my tongue,
I can feel your hands on my flesh.

Behind my eyes the tears hold steady.
I go to him, confused and disgraced by what I have done.
He looks and sees what you see, he feels what you feel.
He knows not of you.

I feel as if I'm in the endless run in the rain,
drowning in my own sadness.
So I sit on the stairs and wait, wait in shame and lingering with guilt.
Trying endlessly to compose myself,
for I'm faced now with a tomorrow and what today has brought to my tomorrow.

When the Sun dies

We walked in the shadow of the moon.
We had paradise beneath our feet.
Now I search for traces of his scent in the air,
amidst the trees, through the leaves,
searching for his sweet scent.
His eyes were the color of earth, awakening my soul,
and taking part of it with him.
Now I'm lost, lost in time trying to hold the pieces of our "lovers kiss".
I want to lie this restless head between his arms,
listen to the rhythm of his blood rushing as he takes away my sorrow.
But until then, every time the sun dies, I come to life.
Endlessly searching for our shadows in the moonlight.

Chango's Fire Author Ernesto Quinonez

I originally wanted to write about the book and talk about a great story that was written. I changed gears, it's a book that needs to be read. I'll admit it is not a feel good book by any means, however, you fall for every character! I also enjoyed this book because it is filled with diverse backgrounds and dabbles lightly in different sexual orientations. It is saturated with the Puerto Rican lingo and parental stereotypes, but that is not what kept me reading.....

This book very much peeked my curiosity for a religion/faith I know very little about. I respect all religions/faiths equally. No one religion or faith is right, it is only right when you fit the religion into your life. When suddenly everything come together and you feel at peace with the choice in the faith you have chosen to be a part of. In the book the father character states " I'm not like your mother, I respect that religion and know, because of Hector Lavoe, that that sh*t works!" It is astounding that people as a whole don't see that every religion/faith "works", if you believe, then doesn't it all work itself out, isn't that what faith is?

Through his characters, the all knowing "padrino", Papelito, and his student, the main character, Julio, I am left with wanting to understand what I don't know. Ernesto romanticized Santeria, giving me bits and pieces of facts, and now I'm craving for more knowledge.

I am a very open minded person, learning about a new religion and it's traditions are important. If you don't understand something then you fear it, or worse mock it, only making yourself look foolish and ignorant.

All in all, I was skeptical at first, I was turned off by the book initially; thinking it was one sided point of view through racial eyes, but it proved me wrong. Ernesto Quinonez did an excellent job. I put Chango's Fire down when I finished it, only wanting to read it again. Best of all an Author has planted a seed, a seed that from here, only I can grow and for this I thank him!

I wait....

I can fell him tracking me.
Feel his blood rushing as he finds my scent in the wind.
I hear his heart beating as he closes in.
I feel his cold fingers as he laces them through my hair.
I feel his cold breath on my neck and my body pulses with pleasure.
His lips caress my flesh and I am in pure ecstasy.
As I cry out in the pleasure of pain, I am awakened by my racing heart.
In the wind he whispers..." My Queen...one night, but not this night..",
and now, I wait.
Wait by the moonlight.