shed from within

Trying to escape my mind, sweating with fear,

twisting and turning as the sheets tangle.
Wanting to rip my skin with my fingers,
i have no where to hide.
my heart seeps with loneliness.
not feeling whole i reach for your warm body,
the cold pillow greats my sorrow, i weep into the night.
breathless i suffocate under your palm.
i tell myself someday it will all be gone.
when your poison entered my veins i was eternally addicted.
unable to relieve the grief, hating myself for every tear,
unable to run i am crippled by love.
I watch the nights shadow dance around me from under the moon.
my heart falls silent and i fall to my knees.
I can see the pieces of your soul you have long forgotten.
you speak to me with a cryptic tone, words riddled and confused.
the love wrapped tongue is swallowed by your hate.
relentless i return for more pain, i love all that is you.
how long will you step on my blooming roses?
how long will you steal the scent from the fresh fallen rain?
i shed my skin, curl to my side, hold my cold pillow tight,
the air is filled with cries of sadness as i pass your name through my teeth.
i rememer the star i wished for you upon, i remember our first kiss.
slowly coddled by my saddens, i drift off, shedding my pain from within.

Surrender

on the edge of this earth, the sea watches me.
A sheet of white binds to my clean flesh.
i stand in the wind, i wait.
buried deep within, i have set fire
to dreams that will never be.
alone, i wait for the moonlight.
naked in thought, the crisp white sheet
holds all my emotions captive.
I have nothing left.
my body aches from the cold,
my mind races to find the pieces of what I once was.
"Rid me of this pain!"
I cry out to God,
" where is my salvation?"
Soulless i look the skies.
I am calm in the dead of night.
on the cool earth i sit and wait.
to deafen the sounds of ludicrous mouths,
i've left no trail.
no skeletons remain,
i've left nothing for the blind eye.
I rise, awaken by the night.
i slowly come undone.
my flesh finds comfort in the midnight sun.
i watch as the sheet is carried on the breeze,
slowly lost to the ocean.
i can breathe....
with the moonlight on my back,
nothing keeps me captive.
salvation, i shall find.
but for this night, i have surrendered.